Ye Morning Poste

Bumper Christmas Issue
Or Yuletide. Or Avatarmas. Honestly, it's a special time, I don't care what you call it!

Darlings, with all the alcohol imbibing and wild parties going on for everyone (not just those locker-room lads in the Army of Kaldor!) well - we've got a few days worth of articles to catch up on! So in the first part of your bumper Poste, we have items that have come in over the last week...

A late piece of news just in - after the impromptu success of last years 'Carolling in Rhovanion' (as conducted by a drunk Graham the Gray and a slightly more drunk Salazar) the Shadow Court would like to invite one and all to another Christmas Eve Carolling Session, with plenty of wine, beer, mead, and etheric feedback.

Come along from 7:30pm GMT to the Caradhras Inn, Rhovanion. You'll be sure of a warm welcome!


Vesper Trade Caravan Raided
People of Vesper Face An Old Foe!

It appears that Vesper it again under attack from one of its old enemies, bandits. Recently during a trade caravan that was heading to Trinsic to deliver goods, bandits attempted to attack. Luckily for Vesper, The Royal Marksmen, Kaldor and the Elves were close by to lend a hand fighting of the attackers. We are as of yet uncertain which bandits are behind this attack but some old faces were recognized during the fighting by some citizens of Trinsic. Droeden, Lucius Virius and Kempo among others. All thought to be members of that nasty brigand gang. Let?s hope the good people of Vesper can stand strong against such a cowardly enemy!


Vesper Bank Robbery
Guards Caught Off Guard!

Last evening The Mint of Vesper, Vespers town bank, was raided by a group of sword wielding brigands! The Vesperians fought a valiant defence but alas failed to protect their treasury. It leaves me wondering what Baron Twothumb must be thinking. Perhaps an interview is in order? We are hearing reports that bounty?s have been posted in Vesper with a 10?000 gold reward for information leading to or the capture of any of these violent thugs.


Untitled Leaflet
Posted against the Poste's front door.

To All Interested Parties,

Yet again the Pretender Klion D'Gar has turned his warmongering eye towards the city of Trinsic.
His own quest for power and his inability to control the Yewish bloodlust without allowing them to hound others has meant once more innocents are put at risk!

Under the Pretence of routing out rebels, he now seeks to Usurp Duke Irvyn from Trinsic and force a puppet leader in his place! A puppet no doubt firmly under Yewish dictate!
This Pretender sends his men to attack a Loyalist town, whilst claiming to serve Our King himself!
Our own dear King whose very words the Pretender refutes, denying the very existence of one of the Virtues Our King entrusted us to follow!

This Pretender, who knows little of how to follow any of Our Kings Virtues, who publically gloats over those he has slain in his endeavours, who brings bloodshed to innocent towns under the pretence that they are allied to his enemies and who himself lives a life of hypocrisy, wishes only to subvert a town whose tolerance, compassion and honour he cannot begin to comprehend.

Be not fooled by this Pretender!

The Time has now Come to ensure the Pretender is exposed for what he is!

The Time has now Come to stand against him and his Tyrannical ways!

The Time has now Come to defend Trinsic, lest he turns his eye towards your own home next!

The Time has now Come to Defend Trinsic, to defend Sosaria from the Yewish Threat!


Muldran Skully in Pink Dress
Poste refuses to append the word Shock

An odd occurrence took place at the gates of Trinsic, as such things often do. In fact, darlings, your less-confused reporter is almost inclined to simply whip out the word odd, since really, that's all there is to it.

A group of people - with Muldran Skully trawling nearby - visited Trinsic and slightly confused the Guards, by Muldran singing the praises of someone called the Maestro.


He then headed off into town, and left shortly after. In a pink dress.

Must be that time of year again. Warmth. Friendship. Family. Cross dressing.


Letters

Miss Skeeter
I really must protest in the strongest possible terms, at the scurrilous lies written about me in yesterday's Poste. I was horrified to read of my alleged impending nuptials, and to the Baron of Cove! How dare your reporter (who is so cowardly that they dare not declare their name) put such a complete fabrication into the newspaper?
I thought that this gutter rag could not sink any lower, but once again, you leave me incandescent with rage, at these absolute lies.
For your information, I have been, and still am, living quietly with my relations, Lord and Lady Middlethorn, at the Duchy Tower. His Grace, the Duke can vouch for this, as he visits regularly.
I wish to see a complete retraction of this tissue of lies, and a public apology on the front page, or you shall be hearing from my lawyers forthwith.
Yours in anger
Lady Caroline Middlethorn

[Lola Writes: Well, your truth-writing reporter can't issue the apology, but Rita can let you know herself. But it's nice to see you're getting into the Christmas spirit - all incandescent like a firework!]


Dear Poste
I'm writing about the much maligned Maestro of the Collegium, a delightful young lady by the name of Lyria. A week or so ago, a couple of members of the Shadow Court had a little disagreement with her, and it all went pretty ugly. However, she was most reasonable about the situation, and after I corrected her as to the status of Cherry (being of equal importance within the Court as myself, as a 'Lord Cardinal') she quickly laughed it off as a misunderstanding that could be forgotten. May I add that she has a beautiful laugh, reminiscent of tinkling water, singing robins, and innocent children?

Anyway, just to say that I believe that she is truly embodying the spirit of the season! On another note, I'm wearing a pink dress because I wanted a change. As people know, I have been at the forefront of fashion in previous years, what with my hair, my neon wading boots, and my red dressing gown. I'm a mage, I'm supposed to be eccentric. Besides, it's no more odd than seeing Commander Soulshadow in a dress, hmm?

Yours,

Muldran Skully, Shadow King of the Shadow Court

[Lola writes: Yeah. Right.]


What's On?

Well - being that family time of year, the Poste hasn't been informed of anything big happening for the next few days - so have a simply fabulous holiday, and we'll see you all soon!

(Oh, apart from the Shadow Court 'do' as mentioned above. Your darling reporter assumes cross-dressing is optional.)