| *Gazes upwards and sees nothing but blackness*
I could not wait any longer.
The Lady has not got back to me and Faeryl is now too close. I have sat here at the entrance to the Abyss and now I can delay no longer. It is over tendays now. No doubt my absence has been registered. No doubt my enemies feel a sense of relief. *laughs bitterly*
No. I have sat here, planning, praying and summoning the courage to do what I must do. I can take this torment no more. I am tired. I need to rest. But I never will until I confront my torment face to face. This is what I must do. *sighs heavily, resigned*
This will be my third time in the Abyss. By far the most dangerous. Twice before I have been there, but that was my astral body. And as long as my physical body was safe, then there was always a chance of survival. This time I enter physically. This time my chances are virtually non existent. But it must be done. And if I survive, if I win, how much stronger will I be? Or will I be but a shell of myself? I give myself to Lloth?s will.
Will the group be in safe hands while I am away? *laughs* LL, SD and L. They will protect my interests. That I am sure. Faeryl and Malafae? *sneers* I see a power struggle between them, but they will not get the support of my three most trusted allies. If the others, especially Sabrae, are wise, they will stay out of it. Let Faeryl and Malafae kill themselves. *laughs humourlessly*
*cries out in agony* Foolish Vierna! Why did I do it! Why did I have to seek her out!
Just when I gained all the courage I needed, I cracked! Me, Vierna, the uncaring self centred bitch! *lets out almost a sob* I cracked to an emotion I barely understand, an emotion I refuse to accept exists. I went back to find SD. To tell her Aluve?. I needed one last embrace before I left. Oh stupid weak Vierna!
And SD refused to leave me. She insisted that we go together. I should have embraced her, then killed her. That way she would be spared the dangers and agonies that must be faced. But I could not. I am weak. Emotion has destroyed cold hard thought.
It is time. Hand in hand, SD and I stepped into the void????
I watch, I assess, I report.
Vel'drav l' sil'in qu'ellar d'Hun?ett zotrethen??Jal zhal sha-rasa!!!
Lloth tlu laoles, dosst handmaiden orn naut hojh dos!!!! |