The Commander's Journal - Page 2

Cal Soulshadow · 24-09-06, 03:08 PM

Saturday 26th August

I was at the Rose, talking too VanQa (well, not talking exactly, because she’d lost her voice and had to mime or write things down) when Kaelyn turned up and told me the duke wanted to see me. As we thought we’d figured out a way to get her voice back, I left her with Kai, and trudge up the road to Trinsic.
The duke was there at the gates, but more or less left it to Pierre to do the talking. He admitted that my previous judgement was (in his words) demeaning and that someone of my rank should not have to do chores like a common criminal. Well, indeed. Considering the times I’ve aided the guards against the real criminals, and arranged trainings for them, I’d expect them to come up with something a bit less humiliating.
Of course, humility is a virtue here, whereas pride is one of the three principles of Raza. The Britannians will never see eye to eye with us on such matters.
So, I was told the sentence had been changed from cleaning the jail to a fine, just as it was before. Only now the fine was 25,000 crowns! That’s the amount I had to pay after we invaded Trinsic. Decking a lad who needed it is hardly a misdemeanour of the same magnitude.
Ulran had arrived by that point and said he wanted to talk to me before I made any decision. Not that I’d have made the decision right there on the spot. 25,000 is a lot of money, and way out of proportion for what I did.
I said I’d think about it as it would need to be discussed with the general.
I returned via the Rose to see how VanQa was doing, whilst Ulran returned to Strongholt. I’d been gone so long that VanQa had gone to Ilshenar with Kai to the pool we talked about and had already returned. To my relief, she had got her voice back. Though quiet, she will be able to chant the words of power needed for her to cast magic, and that will aid her against the drow who has been stalking her.
Kai bid me good night, as he was off on one of his nocturnal training jaunts, but agreed to spend some time with me this night, which I am looking forward to.
Once I returned to Strongholt, I saw Ulran had already spoken with the general and the pair of them were going back to Trinsic to sort it out.
I accompanied them, and was ushered into the jail for an audience with the duke.
Duke Irvyn likes to believe he is a man of honour, but the words “sanctimonious” and “patronising” sum him up best.
He and the general argued for some time, and eventually settled on the original fine of 1,000 gold, provided that I apologise to the guards involved. Since the girl, Natalie, was not present, I apologised only to John, saying that I was sorry I had deceived him into thinking that I intended to clean the upstairs jail, and should have just walked out.
Of course, I had my reasons for not simply walking out. Had I done so, the guards would have tried to stop me, and then I would have had to defend myself. That would have resulted in a much more serious incident.
Still, ye live and learn.
The general has decided that our special relationship with Trinsic is over. We will no longer bear arms openly in Trinsic and will aid the guards only if they ask. He decreed that we should always aid Kaelyn, as she treats us honourably, but will leave it to our own discretion whether we aid any others.
It’s about time. Our relationship with Trinsic availed us nothing. They did not aid us in our wars, nor did they treat us any better for it. Yet they gained our protection and our training.
We will remain neutral to them from now on.
Their loss.

Cal Soulshadow · 24-09-06, 03:09 PM

Monday 28th August

Last night’s battle went horribly wrong. I knew we were in trouble when only a handful of Kaldorians turned up at the keep, and only one maul knight (Kurgan) among them. Zach and Jess are a lethal team, but it’s the mauls who make Kaldor such a force to be reckoned with. The lack of them hurt us a great deal.
The Covians weren’t much better off – they were well down on their usual numbers. In fact, numbers on our side were disappointing all round.
It was little surprise, then, that we were overwhelmed by the loyalists. They took back the bank and there was nothing we could do to regain it.
We will have to hope that our numbers improve before we try again.

Cal Soulshadow · 24-09-06, 03:09 PM

Thursday 31st August

I now understand why military leaders from the Tokuno Isles often commit seppuku after a defeat.
We have lost battles before, but never have we been so shamed as last night, when our patrol to Minoc was annihilated by Devante’s marksmen.
We sighted them first at the mines, and saw them off without too much trouble, but then they came again at the bridge, and defeated us.
We picked ourselves up and resolved to drive them back into central Minoc, but failed to take down even one of them.
I am utterly mortified by this crushing defeat. I feel ashamed and humiliated. I wish that I had not survived to see Kaldor brought so low by a bunch of archers. Archers, for pity’s sake! What have we come to?
I feel the weight of Raza’s displeasure, and must find a way to make amends.

Raza’s displeasure may also be due to the strange events of Tuesday evening.
When the old tavern in Strongholt was razed, the builders discovered a tomb beneath the foundations. Four graves lay there, and one contained a strange, arcane tomb sealed shut by an iron padlock.
Try as we might, we could not open the book without risking destroying it.

Then the minions started to arrive. Xathos minions. It was the book they wanted, of course. We fought them as best we could, but they guarded the shrine they had built with single-minded ferocity. Try as we might, we could not hold them off long enough to destroy their shrine.

Then something strange happened. Damarus arrived, and the minions turned on him. This I had not expected! Of course, Damarus made short work of them, before turning his attention to us.

I’d ordered the men to lock themselves in the keep, and so we conducted a short but relatively peaceful exchange in the doorway. The book, he said, was needed to cast a one-way portal to Xathos’ realm. Outcast that he is, he wanted to go there, and promised that if we gave him the book, we’d not see him again. In exchange he would give us the last, missing piece of Glory.

It seemed like a good offer, but how could we trust him? This abomination of a man who had done unspeakable things, who had turned Kaldorians into minions, tortured others, and tricked us into killing Rolo... How could we let him escape justice?
The problem is that, to a follower of Xathos, death is no deterrent, and no punishment. In death, Damarus would be even stronger than in life.

Kai didn’t want him to have the book, but in the end the general decided that it would be for the best if we gave it to him, and he was out of our hair for good.
Thus the exhange was made, and Damarus left. Whether we’ll see him again, I don’t know. Letting him go so easily gave me an empty feeling, but ultimately, we had little choice. Greg and I wanted to toss the book into the Lake of Fire, but Damarus warned us that, such was the book’s power, that the realms of Xathos and Raza would become one. This I could not risk, so I went with the general’s decision. Whether it will come back to haunt me, I don’t know.

As it is, I couldn’t feel much worse. If Damarus turned up on my doorstep this evening and ran me through with his kryss, I doubt I’d care. After last night’s shocking display, I feel that I’ve let my men down, and let myself down. Even the return of the final piece of Glory cannot lift my spirits.

Cal Soulshadow · 24-09-06, 03:09 PM

Thursday 7th September

So much has happened that I've had little chance to write.
Ulran and I had a spectacular falling out, over his opinions on Kai. While we were in Trinsic a few nights past, he made some snide comment about being surprised that Kai hadn't run back to his daddy, meaning Damarus. For that I called him an arsehole, which he took great offence at, but then his own comment was offensive to me.
I can understand that he has reservations about Kai, being as he is a former minion, but Kai hates the Xathosians and, most of all, Damarus. The fact Ulran doesn't trust him means that he also has no faith in me. He believes my judgement to be impaired where Kai is concerned. Aye, he has reason for that, based on past actions, but what is done in the heat of the moment is no indication of how someone will act in the future.
I have gone into this relationship with Kai with my eyes open. My loyalty is still to the army, and to Raza.

Knowing that he would be returning to Gorimdor soon, I went to clear the air with him. He was in the new Strongholt tavern with the general, so I went to their table, only to be told to go away, since they were discussing Kai. I was angry about that, and later returned to ask Ulran for a private audience.
He refused me, saying he had nothing to say to me. Thus, as is my right as a Kaldorian, I challenged him to fair combat, and again he refused.
We ended up arguing in the tavern, in front of the men; something that could have been avoided had he agreed to talk privately. It was clear that he didn't want to make up with me, despite all that we have gone through in the past. He has not forgiven me for the events of months past, and that hurts me a lot.

He has gone now. I went to the temple this morning and his room was empty and his things had gone. I feel badly that we parted on such bad terms, but almost relieved that he is gone. I hope that his new posting will grant him some new perspective and that he will return to us in due course, a wise and more mature man.

Cal Soulshadow · 24-09-06, 03:10 PM

*this excerpt is written in an unruly scrawl, as if by the hand the writer is not accustomed to using*

Monday 11th September

The war rages on in the North. I’m told we acquitted ourselves well in Minoc, though I saw little of the battle myself. The enemy concentrated their attacks on me immediately and there was nothing I, nor anyone else, could do. I was hit by several people at once. Most of the blows did not get through my armour, but I felt a sickening pain in my right shoulder, and then my arm went completely numb.
I staggered off to find a medic, but there wasn’t much they could do other than put my arm in a sling. There is little doubt that the joint has fractured and it may be some time before I can use a sword again.
Kai seemed quite upset that I had been injured, even though the injury itself is far from life threatening. Nonetheless, I am concerned about whether I will be able to return to active duty. I will turn 40 next year, and although I am fit, I am carrying a lot of old injuries and I do not heal as fast as I once did.
I will see a surgeon tomorrow for an assessment. Hopefully the prognosis will be good.

Nephiroth was promoted to the main ranks and we received a new sorcerer from Gorimdor. Kesh, his name is. He’s from Treido – probably from one of those nomadic desert tribes, judging by the look of him. Quiet and polite so far, unlike most of the men we’re sent these days. Makes a change.

Cal Soulshadow · 24-09-06, 03:10 PM

*this excerpt is still somewhat illegible*

Wednesday 13th September

I went to see the surgeon last night. The prognosis was not good. My humerus is fractured in several places, right at the top. Left untreated, it will heal slowly, but I might never regain a full range of movement. Worst case scenario is that I may never be able to wield a sword again.
I asked about surgery but he said the risk of infection was too great, and that he would only risk it for conditions that were life threatening. I told him that I considered being unable to wield a sword life threatening, but he declined. He said that, even if he were to operate, there was no guarantee he would be successful.
Knowing that medical science is more advanced back in Gorimdor, I have written (or rather, dictated) a letter asking if they can do something for me there.
I hope to hear something back soon.

When I’d finished the dismal consultation with the surgeon, I travelled to Trinsic to pay in a cheque at the bank. As soon as I arrived I heard grave news about Talon. He had been captured by the Yew militia and tortured. One of his eyes had been gouged out.
I made my way to the healers and found him there, still conscious. He had been badly beaten and his face was so bruised and swollen it was almost unrecognisable. They had taken the left eye, and the wound was still bleeding. Hugo was there with Tanya the guard, so I asked them to fetch some alcohol and a hot knife.
Since I only had the one hand at my disposal, I asked Hugo to hold Talon’s eyelids open whilst I applied the hot blade to the inside of his eye socket, cauterising the blood vessels there. The smell was quite disgusting.
Talon bore the treatment bravely (better than Tanya, who was trying her best not to puke – she did well under the circumstances though) and was able to walk back with me to Strongholt. We must’ve looked a right sight – him with an eye gone and I with only one usable arm.
It’ll take him a while to adjust to the loss of his depth perception but he’s a tough lad and he’ll find other ways to compensate. As will I if my shoulder cannot be repaired.
They had taken his cloak, so I gave him a replacement – my old cloak from back when I was a captain. It fitted him well enough, despite the fact he is considerably taller than I.

It is lucky for the Yew militia that I cannot fight at present, but there will be plenty of time to serve up some justice. Even though Talon doesn’t want to take revenge, I’ll not allow them to get away with this. I’ll have someone’s eye before the month ends.

Cal Soulshadow · 24-09-06, 03:11 PM

*the writing seems to have improved slightly, but still isn't great*

Thursday 14th September

My shoulder continues to pain me a great deal, and makes sleeping very difficult, especially as I keep rolling on it during the night. The sooner I hear from home, the better.

As for the army’s other walking wounded, I didn’t see Talon all day. I hope he took my advice and got some rest. It’s all very well to try and soldier on, but when ye’ve been on the receiving end of a trauma like that, yer body needs time to recover and adjust.

The new viper, Tyler, reported that he’d heard a female Waywatcher whom he identified as Floria, talking about Talon’s capture and subsequent ordeal. This is the same girl who came to Strongholt recently to ask if we could take back Cecil after Talon had left him in Yew. She was rather timid and I nay think she would have been part of Talon’s torture, but she will certainly have witnessed it. I have ordered the Vipers to bring her in so that we can question her, and find out which of the bastards blinded him.

I then sent the lads on patrol to Minoc, and once again they ran into the Marksmen. Mordy did a good job leading them in my absence, and it was good having a couple of sorcerers there along with Foxy. Aze, the new sorcerer, seems quite useful, though that is unsurprising given that he is a disciple of Raza.

The lads brought Devante back to the prison in Strongholt but he had nothing useful to tell us. He claims the Yew lot nay tell him much so he had no idea of who was responsible for what happened to Talon. I implied that I might remove one of his eyes with a rusty spoon, but that didn’t encourage him to open up. Not that I would have done such a thing, since it would’ve upset VanQa.

Then the lads brought in another cohort of Devante’s; a lad I know as Boo Radley. They greeted each other in a manner that indicated there was some intimacy between them, so I thought I would have some fun with them, and had them thrown in the hot tub. Unlike Lyim and Joey Lanai, my purchases from the Swaggers bachelor auction, this pair seemed to enjoy the experience far too much. I do wonder what has passed between them in the past, and hope that it did not involve bodily fluids.

Cal Soulshadow · 24-09-06, 03:12 PM

Sunday 17th September

Kai and I finally consummated our relationship.
He was helping me undress last night and it seemed to me that he had become more at ease with me and was no longer afraid. I asked if he wanted to try and he replied that he trusted me.
Such was the lack of education among his people that I had to show him how to position himself, but once in situ he seemed to know instinctively what to do. Once he realised that the experience was neither painful nor traumatic, he took to it with great enthusiasm, though he remained mindful of my broken shoulder and did his best not to hurt me.
I am a little sore this morning, truth be told.
Kai is still asleep; no doubt exhausted from his adventure. I will let him rest for now, for there is another battle tonight and he needs his strength.

Cal Soulshadow · 24-09-06, 03:12 PM

Monday 18th September

Last night’s battle was a resounding success. The men fought well, and prevailed against the loyalist forces. Minoc’s bank and commercial quarter is now under rebel control. Hopefully we can go on to take the rest of the town and end this thing for good.
Although I don’t want it to end before I can fight again. I miss the battle. I miss the blood on my blade and the fire in my veins.
Perhaps, soon, I will be able to fight again.
While the men were in Minoc, I received word that the mail ship had arrived. A letter had come. A specialist will see me on the 28th. I’ll sail out a day or two beforehand and show Kai a little of Kaldor City. I think he’d like that.

We had a problem this evening.
Talon has been very despondent since losing his eye. I took some time to talk to him but it’s up to him to sort himself out. He doesn’t want pity, and yet he seems to be feeling pretty sorry for himself. Losing an eye is pretty bad for a viper, but I’ve seen men come back from worse (and if this surgery doesn’t work out, I may have to come back from worse myself). He just needs to give himself time to adjust, instead of trying to rush things, only to be disappointed because he is not getting back to normal as quickly as he wants.

While I was talking to Talon, Kai had an encounter with Kurgan Grimholt, Vognar’s younger brother, in Trinsic.
I arrived there to find Grimholt dead on the road. He had been cut clean in half. Kai said that Kurgan had challenged him to a duel, and of course, in Kai’s culture, duels are always to the death. Kai told me that he’d declined, but Kurgan insisted, and called him a coward. Kai killed him in two hits.

I ordered Kai to take the remains back to Strongholt and bury them in one of the spare plots inside the Temple of Dondinia. There was no way to send them back to Gorimdor, since the guts kept falling out and would have started to rot almost immediately.

This, and other things, will have to be explained at the officer meeting tomorrow. For now, I need my sleep.

Cal Soulshadow · 24-09-06, 11:33 PM

Sunday 24th September

I heard the ship was to arrive today, at midday, so I decided to spend one last night in Trinsic with Kai.
After the whole business with VanQa being kidnapped by that mad drow, Iglata Slyannen, the Rose wasn?t really the most relaxing place to be. I hope she is alright and feel bad for going away when she needs our help the most, but I?m sure Devante will do what he can.
Kai and I went to the Keg and Anchor, and ran into Alraune Kestrel and her consort, Adammir Walker. I have chatted with them before and they seem a pleasant enough couple, though she is not quite human.
She offered to read my tarot cards, so being somewhat curious about this practise, I agreed.
There were five cards in all, representing past, present and future. The card of my past showed pain and suffering, both physical and emotional. Adversity, I suppose. Not entirely inaccurate, though most can say they have suffered at some stage during their life.
Other cards represented a deceitful youth, and a weak leader, and a good future: one where I will have fought the good fight, she said, and will find release. Of course, death can be a great release. But it is good to know I will die having accomplished much.
Kai also agreed to a reading. His was a good reading also, on the whole. Apparently he is destined to do great things!
Kai was a little unsettled, but then he had also been drinking cider. Of course, he never normally touches anything but water, but he wanted to try something. As he hadn?t liked ale when he tried it in the past, I suggested cider, since it is a little sweeter and more agreeable.
I think he got through about seven jugs and was really quite drunk!
I had to help him back home and up the stairs, and it is quite hard guiding a 300 pound man when ye have only the one arm to guide with.
Once in bed, the drink seemed to make him more affectionate, and he was rather more tactile than usual. However, he fell asleep very quickly!

Of course, this morning he woke up to his first hangover. I could tell he was suffering but didn?t want to let on.
I hope the crossing is fast and smooth as otherwise he?ll spend most of the trip heaving over the rail, much like Mordred.

The ship they?ve sent is a new one, Storm Runner, which is apparently even faster than the Forced March. This time tomorrow, we?ll both be in Gorimdor! I?m really looking forward to showing Kai the sights of Kaldor City, though I?m a little nervous about introducing him to my father?
My main concern, of course, is for my shoulder, and whether it can be repaired. Raza will be looking out for me, I?m sure.

Cal Soulshadow · 05-10-06, 12:02 PM

Thursday 5th October

The visit home went smoothly enough, although Kai looked (unsurprisingly) rather green on the way over. I don't think he'll be drinking cider again any time soon.
He seemed somewhat in awe of Kaldor City, particularly the magnificent buildings of the Temple District.
My father was staying at the Priesthood Building so I introduced him to Kai. They were a bit wary of each other, truth be told, but that's to be expected, given Kai's history. At least they were not openly hostile.
I did ask about Ulran's new posting but he was curiously reticent about that. All he would say was that Ulran was still in service to Raza, but not where, or in what manner.
This does concern me somewhat. I know Ulran and I fell out quite spectacularly before he left, but I do still care for him. I know that he lives, at least. The bond between us is such that I would know if he were to die.

The shoulder surgery itself went well. I was given opiates for the pain and then I was opened up and a steel pin inserted. I remember little, save for the horrendous nausea afterwards.
The joint will heal correctly now. Raza will aid me in making a quick recovery. However, I can't afford to rush my return and must rehabilitate the arm and joint thoroughly. If I use all the means I have at my disposal to heal myself, I can have the blasted sling off in a week or so.
In the meantime, I have become almost adept at using my left hand. But I'd still rather have the right arm usable again!

The return journey was uneventful. Kai, who was not hungover this time, was quite impressed by the Tieous Gate and I think he enjoyed the journey.

It felt a little strange to be back in Strongholt again, but not unwelcome. The men have been doing well and victory in Minoc is almost assured. Last night's patrol resulted in a victory against Devante's blasted archers, though the loyalists are still camped out in the northernmost part of town.

Talon and Mordred seem to be handling things well enough, though I've not seen Talon since I got back. I hope he is managing better with his missing eye.

Cal Soulshadow · 09-10-06, 09:52 AM

Monday 9th October

There is a distinct chill in the air now, and the evenings are drawing in. The long summer has ended, and winter is on its way.
I am glad to be living in the jungle, where it never gets truly cold. Coming from the arid Vaast region, I tend to feel the cold, and though I dislike the jungle humidity, it is, at least, warm.

Today my sling comes off and I begin the long process of rehabilitation. My shoulder aches a lot, but the incision is healed now, and I can begin with light exercise.
It is very frustrating not to be able to return to active duty immediately. I miss doing battle, and the comradeship of the men.

Talon has been doing very well in my absence. Being thrown into the thick of it has done him some good. He has learned to cope with his restricted vision, and even won a prize at the Trinsic archery contest.
He was not around until late last night for the battle in Minoc, so I had to put Kai in charge. Kai has not taken charge of a battle before, and I think he did quite well, despite his initial reluctance. I'll make a soldier of him yet.

Cal Soulshadow · 11-10-06, 06:11 PM

Wednesday 11th October

The blasted sling is off, but there is a lot of work to do. Much as I yearn for combat, I cannot afford to rush things.

Last night, temptation nearly got the better of me when I went to the Sword and Shovel in Valoria. They were holding a darts match, and after Kai and Talon had failed to beat the winning score, I thought I would chance my arm (quite literally, as it turned out). Since throwing a knife at a board mainly involves wrist rather than shoulder action, I thought it would not stress me unduly, but it's amazing how much control ye lose after a month of immobility. Still, even though I missed the board a couple of times, I still managed a score good enough for second place, which isn't to be sniffed at.

Kai has been wonderful recently - he has become more caring and affectionate. He also seems to be a quick learner in the bedroom, though how much of that is down to the books he found on the ship home, I'm not sure. The books - a rather tawdry selection of poorly-written erotica - had been left in our cabin by a previous inhabitant. I'd no idea he'd taken them with him until I saw him reading one whilst he stood at the West Gate in Trinsic.

I just hope he doesn't think the situations in these books are an accurate portrayal of real life relationships. I'm not sure I could live up to "The Princess and the Pirate" every night...

Cal Soulshadow · 14-10-06, 12:09 PM

Saturday 14th October

Attended a nice Friday 13th event at the Trinsic Rose last night. There was a bone collecting contest, so I partnered up with Kai and we went to Haven to hunt horde minions.
I still cannot hold a sword in my right hand so I tried wielding a blade left-handed and managed to kill a few. I think I would struggle against a human opponent or one of the smarter monsters, though the little horde minions are not too difficult, even in my injured state.
We won a prize for collecting the second highest amount of bones, and the most skulls. I think Kai enjoyed himself, though it's not always easy to tell with him.
There was a spooky story-telling contest as well. A masked entertainer had prepared an epic poem about Murphy the Skinner, and told it very well.
As there were only a few contestants, I told the story of when Raul captured me and left me to be eaten by zombies, though it was all ad-libbed.
Surprisingly, Gwen, the elf now in charge of the Rose, said she couldn't pick a winner. The masked performer was the clear winner, in my eyes, having obviously put the most effort in.
It seems strange not having VanQa at the Rose. Gwen is nice enough, but she isn't VanQa.
She's very pretty, in that strange elvish sort of way, so she has already attracted admiring glances from many of the men. Predictably, Devante has already hit on her, but then he'll hit on anything in a skirt. I should really put him out of his misery before he contracts syphilis.
Damn my shoulder!

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