Return of the Grumpy Old (and young) Women (and blokes if they want) Thread!

[cherry]

you could also mention that the house was built on an ancient medieval cemetery where you believe *invent some reference to quote* archaeologists excavated people who had died from the plague..........combination of ghosts haunting the house and possible remnants of the plague in the area should put off any prospective buyers

[Snubson]

Pff...its in a sucky town anyway! whose gonna buy it?

[Ebony&Markus]

Stick something black or greenish on the wall, cough constantly pointing at it and moan the landlord really needs to fix the damp. Maybe mention developing asthma and a strange rash since living there. Mentioning a strange cheesy like smell coming from the bathroom as well. If you have carpets, mention maybe they need to be sprayed as the fleas from the last tenants cat are still live and well.

[athos]

cheers for the thoughts it's brightened me up this morning!
And Snub ... my pulp-fiction-and-crap-music-loving ex next door neighbour sold her house in about 2 weeks, so obviously some deranged idiots want to live in this sucky town!
I don' wanna moooooove!

[angels_and_daemons]

Arg! catching a train to work is bad... 3 times over three weeks they canceled and delayed enough trains that I couldn't get to my 2 hour a night crappy part time job... then my alarm clock breaks and I miss an extra morning shift so the council tell the agency they don't want me any more because I'm un reliable - feck, now I have a council tax bill and a gas/electricity bill I wont be able to pay because there is no more work here. ARG!

[Cal Soulshadow]

Double post.

[Cal Soulshadow]

Also, bad smells put people off.
A full, smelly bin (fish the night before? Or onions?) will help, as will chewing a lot of sugar free gum, which makes you fart due to the sorbitol content. Leave a few damp towels around for that eau de cats piss smell. Sorted.

[Sally Buttons]

My sister's little cat got run over and killed this morning

[Cal Soulshadow]

Sorry to hear that.
I'd be scared to let my cats out for that reason (not that I have any, but if I did).

[Anorah]

Thats the exact reason I dont let any of my cats out.. I had my first cat that was mine alone die by car after 5 lovely years with him, I wont go through that again! I liked that cat more than I liked most people!

Sorry to hear Sally

[Cal Soulshadow]

One of my big candidates has chosen to accept a job I didn't put him forward for, after I'd done a lot of work on him. Bang goes my commission!
*mutters*

[Sally Buttons]

I thought I'd managed to avoid getting the cold that everyone else seems to have, but the bastard got me today!

[Cal Soulshadow]

One of Fred's rats died. It sucks because it was one he'd hand reared and she was only a few months old. She was fine one day then very sick and peeing blood the next. The vet gave her a jab but she still died that evening. He's pretty sad about it.

[Sally Buttons]

Gahh! Why are new mobile phones so hard to work??

[Sally Buttons]

Still on the subject of phones, I treated myself to the Killers' new cd the other day, and inside it was a flyer about having Killers ringtones on your phone. So I texted and paid three quid to have an excerpt from "Read my mind" and what did I get but a lousy, measly, mingy THREE WORDS and no tune, that lasted about one and a half seconds. That works out at a pound a word, which I consider a complete bloody rip off. Bastards! I can't even use it as a fecking ringtone, because it's too embarrassing.